Why is my baby waking up for hours at night?

Help! My child is waking for hours in the night!

Have you ever experienced a night where your child wakes up for several hours in the middle of the night ready to party and then sleeps soundly until morning? This is what we in the sleep coaching world call split nights, or if this happens early on in the evening, false starts. Split nights can be frustrating for parents, and they also affect the child's sleep quality and overall health. This blog post will discuss why split nights occur and some sleep training tips that can help parents fix them.

Why do split nights happen?

Split nights can occur for several reasons such as too much sleep, not enough sleep, hunger, discomfort, teething, illness, or separation anxiety. Once the child wakes up,,they may need parental comfort or attention to return to sleep. Split nights can also happen when a child's nap schedule is disrupted during the day, messing with their wake windows, or when they are having too much sleep in a 24hr period. It's worth looking at how much sleep overall your child is having in a 24hr period vs how much (on average) they actually need. As a sleep coach I look at both scheduling and total sleep. Another reason for split nights is a simple one - your child may just not need quite as much sleep overnight as you would like them to have and all the sleep training in the world can't change that sadly!

What impact do split nights have on my child (and me!)?

Split nights can affect the quality of a child's sleep and have an impact on their overall health. Poor sleep quality can lead to irritability, mood swings, lack of concentration, and restlessness for both of you. It can really affect how you parent, vs how you want to parent. Children who experience split nights may also have difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep in the future, which leads to long-term sleep problems. Consistent and good-quality sleep is vital for a child's physical and mental development, and a good sleep coach can design a sleep training programme to help you achieve this.

How do I fix split nights?

Stick to a consistent bedtime routine: Routines are important because they set expectations for the child's night-time sleep. Following a consistent bedtime routine, every night can help the child's body recognise when it's time to sleep. There’s a reason why a bedtime routine is one of the pillars of sleep training!

• Ensure your child is getting enough calories during the day: A child who is hungry at night may wake up multiple times. Ensure they are getting enough to eat during the day, so they are not hungry at night. This a top sleep training tip.
• Comfort measures: If your child is waking up due to discomfort, try comfort measures such as placing a lovey, using a special blanket, or dressing them in comfortable clothes.
• Address any underlying issues: If there is an underlying issue such as teething, illness, or separation anxiety, addressing it can help reduce the number of wake-ups.
• Evaluate how much sleep your child is having in a 24hr period and see if your routine needs any tweaks. I do this with every family I work with for sleep training.
• Be patient: Sometimes, split nights simply occur as part of the child's development. They'll eventually outgrow it; the best thing you can do is be patient.

In summary...

Split nights are really hard to deal with. There's so many reasons that they can happen, the key is figuring out what is at the root of your child's night wakings. This can be tricky and take time to do, so the first thing to remember is be patient. The second thing is to give yourself some grace. You're tired, your child is tired, and everyday tasks can feel monumental.

If split nights persist after trying all of the advice above, it's a good idea to check in with your paediatrician or a sleep coach for further guidance and support.

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