Lullabies
Journal·3 min read

How to choose the right sleep trainer for your child

Read my blog for the questions to ask your potential sleep coach!

Lisa Adair
Lisa Adair
Published 26 February 2023
How to choose the right sleep trainer for your child

The sleep coaching and sleep training market has exploded, and it can be difficult to know where to turn or whom to hire as your sleep coach. If your brain is already fried from googling ‘baby sleep’ 'wake windows' or ‘sleep consultant near me’ at 3 am, I’ve popped some questions below that I think are vital to ask the sleep coach you are considering hiring!

  • One of the first things to consider is your sleep coach’s experience. There is no standardised course for sleep coaches or sleep trainers, so you need to look at more than just the course they have done to be a certified sleep coach. Many have been teachers in early education or mothers who have struggled with their own child’s sleep and have decided they now want to help others. Others, like myself, have a nursing background (I’m a paediatric/neonatal nurse with 20 years of experience). You know what you’re looking for, and what gels with your family’s parenting style. No qualification is a big red flag- it shows that they aren’t invested in their career, therefore how invested will they be in your family’s sleep?
  • It's important to know how your potential sleep coach or sleep trainer stays on top of current research and evidence in sleep coaching and children's sleep. It’s no use ‘doing a course’ if they did it 10 years ago and haven’t continued to learn, evolve and change their practice based on current research and evidence-based practice! Do they advocate cry it out? Or do they practice more holistic, gentle forms of sleep training? Are they aware of the latest safe sleep guidance? These are some really important things to know before you start!
  • Which methods does your sleep coach use? Are they quite rigid in their sleep training/coaching style? This may be what you need, as this fits with your parenting style and personality type. Are they very flexible in their sleep coaching/training methods? This may appeal to you if this is your style of parenting. Much like a therapist, a good relationship with your sleep coach or sleep trainer is vital for you to have success together.
  • How much support is includedand how is the support given? Sleep coaching is an art, not a science. If I could wave a magic wand and instantly fix your baby or child in one night, I’d love to do it! Every family and child are different and above all, every child is unique and there is no one size fits all solution. Quite often, although a sleep trainer has given you a tailored plan, it will be tweaked and changed along the way depending on your child's progress. That’s why it’s important that you pick someone who will give you the ongoing support level that you think you need.
  • Ask your potential sleep coach/ sleep trainer what they would suggest that you haven’t already tried. This will let you know how closely they've been listening to you in your initial call, and lets you see how flexible they are likely to be if the going gets tough, and things don’t go quite to their plan (which does happen!).

Choosing the right sleep coach or sleep trainer for your family's needs is a difficult decision, and you absolutely should do your research as to who is out there. Don’t be afraid to tell a potential sleep coach exactly what you need, as this also helps them know if you’ll be a good fit together or not. You need to feel comfortable and able to chat to them without fear of judgement, or of them not actually listening to you. It can be a hard search, but hopefully I’ve given you some of the right questions to ask. If you would like to discuss sleep coaching further for your family, let's have a chat and see if we are the right fit for each other!

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Lisa Adair, IBCLC
About the writer

Lisa Adair

Paediatric sleep consultant and Internationally Board Certified Lactation Consultant. Before founding Lullabies, Lisa spent 20+ yrs as a NICU and paediatric nurse with the NHS. She works with families in Dubai and worldwide, by video.

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